If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
