My cat gives me a boner
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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