i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
