My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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