Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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