I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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