Your tits are I can't wait for
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize