writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
