i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize