I am spending my child support on dildos
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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