Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
