sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
