lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
