Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
