then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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