that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
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