Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Randomize
