dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
