Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
