I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I don't think brook has ever known best
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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