Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
