Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Hippo gnu deer
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
