Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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