Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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