You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
