Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
