I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize
