Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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