I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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