My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
