she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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