Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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