P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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