So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
