Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
