How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
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