You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize