would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize