Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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