I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
My apartment stinks of burning failure
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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