The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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