I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
is that a dick in a sweater?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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