so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
