oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
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