Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
