This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
