Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
