So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
