No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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