How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
