Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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